First Post to Self

Hi, Self!

It's been a while since we last talked to each other. 

Busy much with the business, right? Congrats on your cute baby and on you resigning to focus on your job and to be the "boss" and no one else. Well, I can say I still we now have a new boss, Levi :)

I know you have been to hard on yourself lately. And I think this has been taking a toll on your emotional health and physical health as well.

So why not start again? Coz who said there's a limit to starting over again? Hehe. Can we process what we are feeling right now?

Emotional Health

1. Weird but although I think everything is A-Ok, I feel like I wanna do something or I miss doing something. I feel like something is missing.

2. Married life - Ryan is still the same. But he has been playing Dota frequently. I mean, playing online games is okay in your spare time but sometimes, he's neglecting my calls even if we are just beside each other! I hate it really much more if I call him because I need help with Levi. Other than this, we're okay, still aligned with goals in life.

3. Work - emotionally, it is really draining. So if anyone is reading this, if you wanna resign because of your part-time job or business, please, it's not a walk in the park. But I am grateful that we are now onto creating the company of our dreams.

4. Friends - I have friends but I don't have the usual go-to person other than my husband. I think it would be better if I have girl friends to call for a samgyup kind of date.

Physical Health

1. Fat - I am now weighing my heaviest ever! 63.85 kilos! And just yesterday, I started looking at the mirror more and choosing my food. I also wanns exercise but due to my sched, I just can't. But still hope to find some time in the next few days.

2. Tried - I am easily tired. Probably because I weigh so much now. I feel like I don't have the energy to do things and to talk to people as of the moment. I feel like going down.

Spiritual Health

1. I admit, after a couple of years, I began to question my existence, God, Jesus Christ. I know there has been a time that I am super sure that God exists. However, I just feel drained. I feel like something is missing. Maybe it's my relationship with the Lord?